Required Reading For Today's Men, By "jhmetal" (Hoboken, NJUnited States)
This book should be required reading for all young men today. Many are the good and decent men in our society who have suffered emotional terrorism at the hands of sick and manipulative women.
First and foremost, the authors are to be commended for having the guts to state the truth: that men suffer a great deal ….. The utterance of this overwhelming truth is a great risk for anyone to take, especially in a culture that refuses to believe that women are capable of and in fact do commit violence against men. … I think that this book is an important step in breaking the wall of institutional silence and propaganda that allows men and children to remain in harm's way.
But more importantly, this book reveals the problem of emotional abuse against men. Emotional abuse and emotional terrorism are primary tactics of abusive and manipulative women. In using the tools of emotional manipulation, the abusive woman can be a subtle foe; she often preys on men who are good of heart, twisting their good intentions until she achieves her objectives. … The authors here provide a good look into the characteristics of the emotionally abusive and manipulative woman, and strategies to extricate one's self from her grasp.
I will be recommending this book to any male I know who is about to enter the world of dating and relationships. It's about time men got smart and started looking after themselves. Too many good men are suffering!
Essential Guide for Men and Women, June 29, 2009, By Richard Staats (McLean, VA USA)
This is a book that I wish that I had read 40 years ago. It would have saved a lot of grief.
The book is written by a man and woman team, and it treads boldly into areas that society likes to ignore and mock.
The premise of the book is excellent, to help people (men and women) identify destructive women and to know what to do when confronted by such a woman. The book follows through admirably by presenting a case complete with well researched facts.
Very nicely done! I recommend this book to any adult that might ever come across a destructive woman. Yeah! That means that everyone above the age of 18 should own a copy of this book!
Astounding book! By C. Kelley
"Get this book while you still can. It is a truly remarkable read, and of all the books available to men about women, this is one of the best. It is very well written, and covers all bases."
"Venus discusses an important phenomenon of the modern era - the unscrupulous woman who uses the protection of the family and criminal law systems as a way to plunder men and gain revenge against them. We hear all the time about how men take advantage of women, but the opposite is at least as common. Venus does important work in bringing that side - the 'Dark Side' to light." www.GlennSacks.com
A must for every father, husband, and boy., 25 April 2008
By Jo Bloggs "A good Father fighting for his son." (East Midlands)
I used to wonder why some men were so critical about certain types of women. Having become the 'victim' of one of these women I found this book extremely helpful in understanding why I and my son are being 'punished'. This book should be on the National Curriculum. If you are thinking about becoming a father, getting married, or have a son, then you owe it to yourself and future generations of men to read about and raise awareness of these types of women.
The dark-side of every woman, June 30, 2008 By J. Adams "Single dad"
A really usefull book! If you are stuck in a relationship with a manipulative woman, or getting over the trauma of one, this is a must-read.
But this doesn't only reflect intimate relationships, work collegues and even flatmates can also demonstrate this selfish dark-side. The type of female psychosis that this book describes is quite possibly under the surface in most women.
Everybody is in love when they get married... but around half of weddings end in divorce... so, it pays to know the dark-side of the female mind. I suspect that divorce lawyers have already learnt the lessons in this book... that even a good woman has the ability to become a destroyer of all around her.
a must read for all guys By WARY OF MARRIAGE "bigmalky2707" (GLASGOW)
THIS IS A SCARY ACCOUNT OF VARIOUS TORMENTED RELATIONSHIPS AND IS SO GOOD buy it now before you make a commitment guys !!
if you are a man read this, 16 Feb 2009, By bucksman "always reading" (BUCKS, United Kingdom)
I have a friend who contacted fathers for justice for help in dealing with his ex wife and their young son. Even accounting for just hearing one side of the story, one was left with a terrible feeling that the woman was out for revenge at whatever cost, to anyone around her, never mind herself. He mentioned this book and said "everything I want to say is in this."
Certain women won't like this book, but others will recognise that this character really does exist, and could probably point the finger at a friend/colleague of theirs up to the same kind of stunts as those mentioned in the book.
I leant the book to a friend who commented immediately on the case of the Glasgow taxi driver mentioned early on. This one example will shake every man to the core. Also look up the case of Warren Blackwell for those who want to know how bad it can get.
I got engaged to what seemed a like a nice enough twice married before girl, only to see an increasing rate of negative change in her attitude, within days of the engagement. 3 weeks later I pulled the plug. On discussing this with others, it doesn't appear to be that uncommon.
To be fair to the book it does mention that there could be a greater tome written by women complaining about ex husbands. I think my sister could write that all by herself.
Scary insite into what many men and children are living with, September 15, 2008, By nicky
We are experiencing many of the things this book talks about. It is a frightening reality that many courts refuse to recognize. So many children's lives are forever altered and many childhoods are taken away--replaced by a mother demanding that she is the only one to be loved and cared for by her children--and that the children are needed for her welfare, money and survival. She doesn't see it any other way. At the same time that she is trying to destroy a man's life, she is demanding more play money from him. And the children are still asking dad to pay for more and more 'things' they want on top of all he gives already. Dad IS good enough only for money.
ESSENTIAL SURVIVAL MATERIAL, August 24, 2008, By warren oneill
This book and another called 'Rantings of a Single Male' should be required reading for all young men and their mentors.
Excellent. 1 April 2009, By poor man
Another great book read, describing modern day materialistic women and their beahaviours... men get this book...to protect yourselves!!!
note this book and "that bitch" under same authors are the same book.
Men Beware, April 16, 2009, Men Beware, April 16, 2009, By D. Edleman "DWB" (Las Vegas, NV USA)
This is a must read for any male from his late teens on. Some of the things I read in this book I have had to learn the hard way. The rest is just great knowledge to have and to think about when dealing with the female currently in your life and any in the future.
Incredibly well written, organized and easy to read. Thanks for the final, uplifting chapter on healing.
I also rely on "The Rules" and Argov's Bitch books for insight. It is amazing how well you described my experience. I had been really hating myself for getting duped.
I wish I had read these book a few years earlier. I'm giving them to my sons, though I know they could not believe people like this exist. Your book may come in handy for them... someday.
Absolutely brilliant book, yes I recognised the character types in men as well as women. What makes the difference is the legal system. At least 2 of my male friends have been trapped in abusive relationships, now ended but are now being beaten by child access and custody arrangements. They seem to be in a worse position because the law treats them less than equally. It seems that the media does too....we can put men on the moon but we don t seem to be able to sort out with any secular fairness, the affairs of men and women, or have any honest to goodness moral code (regardless of race or religion). I do wonder whether the demise of the extended family has put an end to the 'self policing' of the types of people discussed in the book, and maybe accounts for its apparent increase. Maybe the problem has always existed but modern society is more aware of different character types, personality spectrums and how these merge with mental health issues. "Be aware" this is your defence!
The Due Diligence Checklist is truly amazing. I have downloaded this and distributed amongst my friends for discussion........I wish this sort of thing had been available to me when deciding whether or not to get married. The chat with the vicar didn t really hit the spot and many issues just didn t get discussed (and I mean after the marriage too) Consequently that relationship failed over wanting children. As a single mum now, I shall be using the DCL as part of my decision making process if I start dating again, and I shall urge my children to do the same when the time comes. This is a LIFE CHANGING book and I have been and will continue to recommend it to everyone I meet.
I was talking to a farming friend of mine who had just gone through a horrible divorce after a short marriage and he said to me bitterly, “I went up the aisle with a farm and I came down with a half a farm.”
I had just read the book “That Bitch” by Roy Sheppard and Mary Cleary and as he detailed the happenings in his marriage that had led to his situation, one by one, I could tick them off as they appeared in this invaluable book.
The sub – heading of the book is “Protect yourself against women with malicious intent” and chapter by chapter it lists all the methods used by “domestic terrorists” to get what they want at the expense of innocent male victims. The fact that one of the co – writers is a woman gives an extra insight into the female mind.
They say you should never judge a book by its cover but I certainly did and the title immediately brought somebody to mind and it evoked strong feelings. Anybody to whom I mentioned it had the same reaction, for this book has a universal appeal.
It deals with issues that are absolutely fundamental, yet does so in the most readable way, spiced with a great deal of humour, describing these women as “ pampered predators”, “Al Quaeda in high heels”, “ the elephant in the room, Everybody knows it’s there but no one is prepared to say so.”
The book quotes Madonna “I’m tough, I’m ambitious and I know what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay.”
Victims of nasty women may recognise the following, “You didn’t realise what was being done to you until it was too late. Your initial gut instinct told you there was something not quite right about her, but she seemed so friendly, charismatic, and vivacious, that your instincts had to be wrong. She is never wrong – about anything. She is an expert at the put – down, especially in public and if you complain, she retorts “I was only joking” or “That’s typical of you to over – react.”
Even the chapter headings of this book are arresting;
- “Two of a kind. Meet Ms Truly Evil and Malice in Plunderland”
- “The psychologies of Malice. How to recognise the tactics and behaviour of women who are mad, bad or sad.”
- Divorce – The Final Frontier. What men must do. What men must NOT do, How to select a lawyer.”
“Children as weapons of male destruction. Malicious mothers hate their former partners more that they love their children.”
“Getting out of her clutches. Full Steam Ahead. Rebuilding Your Life.”
In short this book is a must read for men in the middle of an unhappy marriage, those contemplating divorce or even those thinking about marriage. I promise you, you won’t be able to put it down. As the authors say on the back cover “Get this book before she gets you, your best friend or your son.”
Knotheadusc's Full Review: Roy Sheppard - That Bitch: Protect Yourself Against Women With Malicious Intent
Pros: Good resource. Highlights domestic violence toward men. Entertaining.
I just got a shipment of new books. Among my purchases was a copy of That B!tch: Protect Yourself Against Women With Malicious Intent (2007), by Roy Sheppard and Mary T. Cleary. I'm sure most people reading this review can tell exactly what this book is about just by reading the rather scathing title. Regular readers of my reviews will notice that I just recently reviewed another book about so-called "b!tchy women". Ordinarily, I might choose to wait awhile before reviewing a book that is so closely related, but I couldn't resist the way That B!tch was packaged. On the cover, there's a profile shot of a sexy looking redhead, her lips slightly pouted. She looks like she could be dead or unconscious, but the striking red hair against the stark white background was intriguing. I thought it was interesting that folks who came up with the cover art would choose such a provocative photo for the cover. Why is it that redheads are immediately thought of as b!tches? That, along with the title, made me want to read this book first.
On the back cover of this book, the authors ask would-be readers to think about "the b!tch" in their lives and consider what qualifies them for the title. The authors promise discussions about the "bully-girl" tactics of such women, revealing the ploys they use to derail other peoples' lives. The back cover implies that this book could be aimed at everybody, including women, but as I started reading, it became clear to me that this book was intended for men... British or Irish men in particular.
About the authors
Roy Sheppard is a well known British broadcaster, having worked as a reporter, anchor, and presenter for the BBC radio and television networks. He has also written several books, though I'm not sure if he is himself a victim of a vindictive woman. Mary T. Cleary is a nurse who hails from Ireland. Over the years, she's become an expert on treating men who are victims of domestic violence. In 1997, she created Amen, an organization that is dedicated to helping men who are victims of domestic violence.
Why I read this book
Those of you who regularly read my reviews may know that my husband has firsthand experience dealing with a vindictive woman-- that is, his ex wife, not me. I also have a background in social work and public health and have noticed that there is a double standard when it comes to domestic violence issues. Domestic violence against women gets a lot of attention. However, people tend to ignore domestic violence against men, claiming that it's not as big of a problem. Men who deal with violent women are expected to be able to take care of themselves, even though by defending themselves, they could end up going to jail. Moreover, while men are often physically larger and stronger than their female counterparts, sometimes they're not. Sometimes their smaller female counterparts may confront them with a weapon. But this book doesn't just address the issues of physical violence. It also addresses the legal tactics vindictive women often use to get the upper hand in divorce and child custody situations.
What I liked about this book
First off, I like the fact that this book is aimed at men who are dealing with malicious women. I think it's a problem that is much more common than people realize. Books like this one also help eliminate the shame associated with men who cope with vindictive or violent women. I also like this book for the fact that it really does a good job of highlighting the malicious and sneaky tactics vindictive women use to get and maintain control of men. It's written in a relateable, though very British, style that is easy and enjoyable to read. The authors even inject some humor by using funny related quotes from well-known authors and entertainers. At the end of the book, there is a helpful appendix that provides some resources for the people who read this book.
What I didn't like about this book
For one thing, despite the fact that I found it provocative, I don't like the title that much. I don't think the term "b!tch" is a very accurate one regarding malicious and vindictive women. When I think of the so-called "b!tch", I think of someone who is snarky or catty or even overly subservient to someone else. I don't think of someone who uses her children as pawns or as a means of punishment, nor do I think of someone who extorts unreasonable amounts of money from a former lover. Another, much less socially appropriate, word comes to my mind for those types of people. Regardless, while I think the authors were trying to get attention by using the term "b!tch", I don't think it's actually worked out well for them. Indeed, this book was recently re-titled, Venus: The Dark Side, which I think is more appropriate and less offensive. Incidentally, the list price of the newer titled version of this book is inexplicably $5 cheaper than That B!tch is.
Also, I think this book has a somewhat jaded view of women as a whole. The authors seem to be cautioning men to protect themselves against all women, not just the vindictive ones. They present a chapter about men who get women pregnant and are forced to take on the mainly financial responsibility of fatherhood "against their will". However, barring rape or incest, men and women always have a choice when it comes to parenthood. If you don't want to have children, don't have sex. If you choose to have sex, use birth control. For men, that may mean using a condom or getting a vasectomy. In my mind, if a person is that dead set against having a child, it's an easy choice.
I think it's important to reiterate that this book is really aimed at British and Irish readers. The laws that are described pertain to people who live in the U.K. or Ireland. When the authors describe court cases with monetary damages, they are presented in British pounds. And again, the writing style is very British, which may be a turn off or even irrelevant for some American readers, though not necessarily in my case.
I do think That B!tch is worthy reading for heterosexual men who are dealing with a vindictive woman. It won't be as helpful for lesbian women who are dealing with a vindictive partner. As a woman who married a man who has a malicious ex spouse, I thought this book brought up some good points and outlined some of the worst tactics that vindictive women use. I think this book will also be somewhat useful to those who work with male victims of domestic violence in a professional capacity.
Amen's Web site: www.amen.ie
This book also has its own Web site, but the Epinions language filter won't let me post it accurately. ( www.thatbitchbook.com & www.venusthedarkside.com)
Nominated 'Book of the week' by Menstuff.org